MESSAGES FOR FRIENDS

Someone on his status “Sleeping” …since 3 Days! He’s Probably dead. 


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My girlfriend was complaining that I never take her to expensive places, so today I took her to the petrol station.


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I am so poor that i can’t pay attention in class.





What is alarm clock?
It is a small device used for waking up by those people who don’t have little children.


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Success is like being pregnant everybody congratulates you, But nobody knows how many times you got fucked to get there.

I am not virgin, My life fucks me everyday.


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Girls love is like a chocolate.
because it’s too sweet. but the taste is short time,
Caution:every chocolate has an expiry date.
But boys love is like wine,no expiry date.
it gives kick to your body…
that’s boys love…


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People say, you can’t live without love…  I think oxygen is more important.


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Men with pierced ears are more prepared for marriage.
Why?
Because they have already experienced pain and bought jewellery.


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Advice for boys: if you wish to change the country, better do it right now. Because when you get married, you will not be able to change the TV channel, not speaking about the country…


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Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.


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Sometimes you succeed…. and other times you learn.


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I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!… He’s dreaming too.


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F-Fun
R-Rational
I-Impartial
E-Emotional
N-Never Ending
D-Dependable
S-Special
H-Heart
I-lnteresting
P-Priceless


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Doctor told me to watch my drinking. That is why I have to drink in front of a mirror now.


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Did you know how the word „wife“ had been invented?
They just took 2 first and 2 last letter of the word „wildlife“.


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Laughing is the best the medicine.
But,
if you are laughing without a reason,
you need medicine.

I am wondering… if the love is blind, than how will she find me?


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One day I went to the gym and I realised that it is not for me – I laid down on the mat to do some exercises and …
I woke up two hours later.


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Friendship is not collection of hearts but it is selection of hearts.
All friends are not True.
But true friends are very few,
Which includes U……


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A lovely star dropped on earth one night.
Asked me u want a million dollar or a good friend?
I choosen to have million dollars.
.
Because I already have you


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Two Tigers were resting under a tree..
Suddenly a RABBIT passed very fast.
Tiger could not make out & asked,
“What was that?”
2nd Tiger smiled and said:
.
.
.
.
Fast Food…my dear friend!


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A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.





A notice in a factory for girl workers:
If your skirt is long,
protect yourself from machines at work.
If it is short,
protect yourself from men at work.


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What do you call a wife who is sexy,
beautiful, intelligent, understanding,
caring, never jealous and a great cook?
ANSWER : A dream!


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